What the F*** Do I Do With My Life?!

What the F*** Do I Do With My Life?!

Figuring out ones place in this world is a huge undertaking! So don't fret that you don't know what to do just yet. People figure out their own place at their own pace. Some people are born knowing they want to be a doctor, while others don't realize their calling until much later in life. So how do you figure out what you want to do with your life? I have a few bits of advice that might just help you on your path to doing just that.

This is a question that comes up for me every so often. Basically ever existential crisis I have revolves around not having the slightest idea what to do with my life and how to live life to the fullest.

Figuring out ones place in this world is a huge undertaking! So don’t fret that you don’t know what to do just yet. People figure out their own place at their own pace. Some people are born knowing they want to be a doctor, while others don’t realize their calling until much later in life.

So how do you figure out what you want to do with your life? I have a few bits of advice that might just help you on your path to doing just that.

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How We Got Here

If you’re like me and you’re in your 30s with no freaking clue what to do with your life, there’s usually a reason for that. 

Maybe your parents had you focus so much on school that you didn’t have time to develop hobbies. Maybe your parents were discouraging to any of your hobbies. Maybe you were made fun of for the things you liked as a kid. Or maybe your parents had planned out your entire life for you and hobbies outside that wasn’t an option.

Any of this sound familiar?

Most people who are utterly lost in life have no idea what they’re doing. Usually this is because they never had the chance to figure that out for themselves, are having a hard time suffering from the overchoice phenomenon, or both.

If you’ve never had the chance to grow and discover your skills yourself, or you had them diminished by family or peers, it can be such an overwhelming experience to go off to college, or leave home and realize you literally can do anything you want to. (Minus the few caveats of life)

Sometimes the freedom of independence comes with the downside of being completely overwhelmed. That’s okay. You can get through it. It may take time and potentially a therapist if you’d like, but it’s very possible to find your path in life.


What Would You Do If You Didn’t Have to Work?

This is a question I come across a lot when searching how to figure out my own path. “What would you do if you didn’t have to work?” or “What would you do if money wasn’t a problem?” 

This could be incredibly helpful or incredibly useless. Hear me out.

This could be helpful in the way that you’ve never actually sat down and figured out what you would do if you had the time and resources to do something without worrying about how you’ll pay bills. A lot of people who are struggling financially tend to focus on getting out of that mess before moving on to something they might like. I know that was something I did and still do.

But this may not work for everyone. There were times in my life when I asked myself these questions and the answers were “sleep and play video games”. Depression is one hell of a bitch.

Sometimes you have to push past the fog, the depression, the stress, or whatever else it is that’s clouding your mind and coming up with these not very lucrative answers (While video games could be a potential career, sleep most definitely is not).

Try to think past that. If you didn’t have to worry about the sleep or video games, for example, what else would you do? Do you want to travel but think it’s too risky, you don’t have enough money, or you’re afraid of leaving where you are right now?

Related: 8 Things to Do When Depression Hits



What Did You Love to Do as a Kid?

This question is also like the previous as this can be very beneficial or an incredible useless.

Just like before, you may not have been able to do things you loved as a kid. Maybe your parents had your life planned out and all your free time was spent studying, or practicing an instrument, or just doing things they wanted you to do instead of something you actually wanted to do. More often than not, when you’re forced to do something you’re not going to like it very much.

Well, take this time to sit down and think about what you might like to do. It could be anything. Treat this as if you were a kid who wants to do something because they’re bored. If you’ve never had the ability to “be a kid”, give it a try. You’re most likely going to be pretty bad at just about anything you try for the first time, so don’t give up so quickly because you’re not good enough for yourself.

Don’t know what to start with? Wikipedia has this stupidly long list of hobbies for you to choose from. Want a short list of quick and frugal hobbies?

  • Reading
  • Writing
  • Drawing
  • Painting
  • Running (or exercise in general)
  • Hiking
  • Cooking
  • Baking
  • Dancing
  • Yoga
  • Martial Arts
  • Learning a new language
  • Photography
  • Gardening

These are only the first few things that come to mind. If you’re looking for more cheap and frugal hobbies, here’s a list of 100

Related: 5 Things I Learned From Being Raised By My Parents



Emotions and Feelings Are OK

Sometimes when we ask ourselves these questions, the answers aren’t as concrete as we’d like. For me, the answer to “what do you want to be when you grow up” is be stable. 

I want to be mentally stable, physically stable, romantically stable, financially stable… Basically if there’s the ability for something to go off into the deep end, I want that scale to be stable and in good condition.

So wanting to be able to afford to be comfortable in life doesn’t exactly have a specific step-by-step guide on how to do that. There are so many ways to make money, find a partner, and keep yourself healthy. So there’s no real “right” path to follow. 

And that’s okay.

If the answer to these questions leaves you with an abstract feeling or emotion, take the time to sit down and figure out how to get there. Unfortunately that’s something I really can’t help you with in this post, but you may be able to find other bloggers or maybe even one of my older posts, helpful in your journey to figuring out how to get to that feeling.

Related: Is It Okay to be Content When Everyone Strives to be the Best?



So the tl;dr of this post is basically this:

  • What would you do if you didn’t have to worry about money?
  • What did you love to do as a kid?
  • What you want in life can totally be an emotion or feeling. You just need to figure out how to get there.


What is your passion in life? Let me know in the comments below!


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This Post Has 12 Comments

  1. romcomdojo

    I would like to think that if I could write full time for a living that I would get up every morning, open a laptop and write the day away, but I would probably end up writing for ten minutes and then watching The Golden Girls for the rest of the day in my pajamas.

    1. I’d need a new place with a designated room for working like an office space. Right now I actually get a good amount of blogging done while at my current job on breaks. I need that separation aand my bedroom is so small I didn’t think I could fit a desk in there!

      1. romcomdojo

        That’s a good idea – I have a little office space that I use as my painting studio and I get SO much more painting done than if I had to do it in the kitchen!

        1. I hate having such a small bedroom in the first place, but trying to get anything done on my laptop now is pretty hard because I just… my bedroom does not have a “work” vibe. I can’t even block off a portion of the area because I need to move my computer chair to get into my closet. lol.

          But it’s saving me money for the time being. Maybe you should do your writing in your painting studio too!

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