How to Feel Secure if Your Life Goal Isn’t  “Normal”

How to Feel Secure if Your Life Goal Isn’t “Normal”

How to Feel Secure if Your Life Goal Isn't "Normal" // Sometimes our life goals aren't something concrete, or they're different than what most people around us think is a good idea. How do we combat all those Negative Nancy's telling us it's a terrible idea? Click here to read more.

Life goals are something that are almost sacred to every individual person. They’re something we want to do or accomplish in our lifetime. Some people want to have specific careers, some people want to travel to certain places, and some people want some more abstract things like “being happy” or “being a good parent”.

But what happens when your goal doesn’t line up with what society, or at the very least, what your social circle considers “acceptable”. What happens when what you want to accomplish in your life is considered weird or strange?

This can be a big problem for people because more often than not, if you have a goal that is considered “strange” you already know that it doesn’t fall within some sort of norm, whether that be societal, within your social circle, or even within your family. So you have some sort of a heads up to dealing with this.

However, that doesn’t make dealing with the reactions of other people any less hurtful. In this post I’m going to go through ways to make it so those silly comments don’t hurt as much.


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Are You Harming Anyone?

The biggest thing about having goals that other people might find weird, is that they might not completely understand them. This is pretty common with most things, and more often than not when people don’t understand things, they deem it weird, or evil, or whatever the latest emotion is.

However, I feel that as long as your goal isn’t harming anyone (without consent!) then there shouldn’t be any reason to change it. If you want to be a dominatrix, then you do you! If you want to be a serial killer, then I think you should really reconsider. 

Again, if you’re not actively harming anyone, there shouldn’t be a logical reason people object to it. Be prepared with facts or reasonings if you know you might be challenged by certain people.

 

Are You Happy?

This is the most important thing to consider about your own life goal. Are you actually happy doing it? A lot of people might have goals to follow in the footsteps of other family members, but it’s not what they want to do. It’s what they’re expected of them. So make sure this goal of yours is actually yours!

Personally, I want to continue and grow my blogging and become a housewife. A lot of people might object to that because they think I’m wasting my potential, or I shouldn’t conform to gender stereotypes, but this is what makes me happy. If I had a house to myself, I feel I would love being able to take care of it, to be a wife to a loving husband, and to keep everything running in the background.

I would love to be able to do life on my terms, wake up when I want, tidy up a house, keep a house clean, have a loving husband or wife, be able to dabble more into baking and cooking, and most importantly, decorate a house! 

If I find out I’m not happy once I get to this stage in my life, I can reconsider things, but right now, this is what I want to do. If anyone has issue with me being happy, I would gladly like them to explain why I shouldn’t be happy for their comfort.

 

Do You Have a Plan B?

No I don’t mean the birth control, I mean a legitimate plan B. Sometimes our life goals don’t turn out the way we want them. As I mentioned before, I want to be a housewife while running my blog. However, I have no plans to quit my full-time job anywhere in the near future.

Why?

Because I have no idea if my blogging will actually be lucrative. And even if it is somewhat lucrative, I’m the type of person who needs the forced socialization or else I’m hole up like a hermit and never see people ever again.

I’m also open to the idea that my housewife goal won’t work out either. I could either find the wrong partner, discover I don’t actually like what I’m doing as a housewife, or any other option out there that makes me unhappy with what I’ve chosen.

However, my plan B is the ability to leave my partner if it comes to that, change my role or activities in the home, or just reconsider my life entirely. 

You’re not locked into one goal and that’s it. You’re not even locked in in the first place, you can always change your mind at any point in the process. Sometimes this might have personal, financial, or mental repercussions, but in the long run it would be worth it.

If you find out halfway through medical school you absolutely hate being a doctor, then you will have to deal with the financial repercussions, and they might cripple you for quite some time, but you shouldn’t force yourself to do something you don’t want to for money. Not only will you hate it, your patients can tell, and your care will be subpar.

 

How to Feel Secure if Your Life Goal Isn't _Normal_ (1)

 

TL;DR

  • Are you harming anyone with your goal that isn’t consenting to it? Then screw what others have to say. People usually are afraid of what they don’t understand. Help them understand.
  • Are you happy? What’s the point of having a life goal if you’re not happy with it? Don’t do something you don’t want to do, and don’t do something just because it’s expected of you. That might be a hard thing to deal with, but would you rather upset someone else, or upset yourself?
  • Do you have a plan B? Not every goal is going to work out the way you plan, and that’s entirely okay. You just need to keep this in mind when planning out your goal. Have a back up for if things don’t work out right the first time, or if you discover you don’t actually want to do your goal anymore. Be a boy scout and always be prepared.

 

Have you ever had someone object to a goal of yours? How did that go? Let me know in the comments below!

 

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